Family Health and Home

A Young Dad blogs About Family Health, Home, Parenting, Marriage and Everyday Living

Parents Too Early

Teenage Parents – Basti and Andrea. My wife and I became “Parents Too Early”. We were just 17 when I got her pregnant. We got married when we both reached legal age and our parents were very supportive. It was just a simple ceremony, soon as we got Andrea’s parents permission, we were wed. We didn’t want any wedding expenses because were thinking about the days to come. Rather than spending on the marriage, we’ve decided to save the money on bringing up our child and buying his needs.

We were both still studying, Andrea’s parents didn’t want her to stop, neither my parents wanted that too. It was just a good timing because her due date was on the month of May. That summer, I looked for a job and because of low qualifications, I found it hard to land on a good one. My dad recommended me to his Amigo and my Ninong (godfather), Ninong Ricky and he got me a job in one of their restaurants. It was okay when it was still summer, but when classes started it became harder. Andrea and I had to go to school leaving the less-than-one-month old baby  Iñigo in Abuela’s care. If Abuela Anna weren’t around, I don’t know how we would’ve coped. Mom Chloe and Abuela Anna were the ones who were there to guide Andrea in taking care of Iñigo, while I studied full-time and worked at my Ninong’s resto part-time.

I guess we were just too lucky. Even if Andrea’s parents have never shown any support and were mad at me,  my parents, grandparents, as well as my younger siblings understood and accepted us without any judgment. They have given their full support both emotionally, and financially. My dad didn’t want me to work, he said we can just take it as having two additional kids in the family. But Abuelo Tacio(grandpa)  said that as a man, a new father, and a husband, I have to learn how to become more responsible and not let others take the responsibility of raising my son and providing for my wife.

Abuelo Tacio may spoil us in other ways but he was very firm when it comes to discipline. He was right, and so I have been working since then up to now, although I have a better job now, I work for a contact center which pays a lot more and I get to study or sleep in between my breaks. I play with Iñigo and sleep in the morning, go to school after lunch til nighttime, go home to eat and change then go to work. During my days off I try to spend all my time with my family, just the same as dad. So, I make sure that my days off are scheduled during weekends.

Andrea has become good at taking care of our baby, at the same time she has maintained good grades in school and she is trying to keep up to be able to attain if not magna cum laude, maybe at least graduate cum laude in her course. I understood why her parents were angry at us to the point of disowning her. They had high dreams for Dee, because they knew that their daughter was capable of doing great things. And they felt that I have ruined it, and Andrea has disappointed them so much. But they were wrong about it, coz even if Andrea and I will have a hard time, we will do our best to make all our dreams come true and to raise our son into a fine young man and make him proud of us just as how we are so proud of having him.

We may have become parents too early but it was never a mistake, our son Iñigo was born out of love. I’m not saying that I am giving consent of encouraging young teens to do the same, rather learn from our experience. coz honestly, it would be easier for you guys to wait and become parents at the right age and at the right time. It is much easier when you have everything, and you are capable of  providing for your family.

I just want to share the experience that Andrea and I have gone through, and becoming parents things too early. We had to go through the consequences of our actions and decisions. We were just so lucky that my side of the family have been very supportive all the way. Although things turned out good for me and Dee, and we are coping well, I don’t recommend the same thing to young lovers out there, or even to my own siblings. It’s still better to wait, because it’s hard to become parents when you’re not  financially, emotionally, and mentally prepared for it. Remember that things don[‘t happen by accident, we make them happen.

Posted on January 22, 2009
Category: Family Home and Living
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